It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~Phyllis Diller
Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. ~George Bernard Shaw
We advance in years somewhat in the manner of an invading army in a barren land; the age that we have reached, as the saying goes, we but hold with an outpost, and still keep open communications with the extreme rear and first beginnings of the march. ~Robert Louis Stevenson, "Virginibus Puerisque II," Virginibus Puerisque, 1881
I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968
Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. ~Bob Hope
You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely. ~Ogden Nash
Old as she was, she still missed her daddy sometimes. ~Gloria Naylor
You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely. ~Ogden Nash
Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional. ~Chili Davis
I still have a full deck; I just shuffle slower now. ~Author Unknown
Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. ~Truman Capote
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